but more about the neck-laces

i've never been a great swimmer. i was one of the irrational secretive ones that still believed there were sharks in the chlorinated pools of neighbors. ironically, i spent many summers as a child going to the beach without any worries. and these were the beaches with man-of-war monitor lifeguards. as i got older, (free) swimming pools seemed less acessible (not to mention gross). but when i went to italy, and especially when i went to capri, i was determined to swim in the ocean again. (although, paolo insists on reminding me it's only a sea.) and so, i absorbed the salt that had once absorbed into my great grandmother. i've spent my entire life staring at a painting of her swimming that tyrrhenian sea. the current is strong, the beaches are rocky, but it was fantastic. italians swim like fish. i have to practice. italians tan ridiculously well. that one i will practice less.



napoli is the main medium to capri. paolo and i had a terrible fight before i left for napoli. we thought it was over. on the day that i decided to call him and tell him i still loved him, i walked down to the beach. i bought a stick of corn and sat way out on the rocks. i watched the men swim. now that i am home, i stare at my maps on the wall (and write cute stories). i stare at napoli every day.


"did i ever tell you that album is simply fantastic? you know i was never a huge fan. but this album. because his voice rattles inside my body. it's the perfect album for motion. for travel. like rising and falling. listening on the trains. walking on the sidewalks in naples. and i watched the lovers. i watched the sea. i ate corn and sat on those rocks. i laughed out into the sea at all the bullshit that piled up. because i had let go. goddamnit i had let go. i was only full of love. and i watched all the people walking, fishing, driving wrecklessly, the men swimming out in the sea where i would never go for all my stupid fears. i felt the air on my skin. and i truly felt whole. i always feel strange when i listen to this album."